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Category: Doing Divorce

Angela Dunne provides practical advice based on real examples of what she and her clients have faced through the transition of divorce.

Doing Divorce

Angela Dunne provides practical advice based on real examples of what she and her clients have faced through the transition of divorce.

Positive Parenting

“It was SO much fun!!” they cried in a collective chorus as they greeted me.  My daughters had just returned to my house after 12 days away with their dad, stepmom, and his extended family.  I unabashedly let the tears fall down my face as I pulled them in for a tight three-way hug. Knowing my chatty girls, I had prepared for uninterrupted time for them to tell me their tales.  I knew if I wanted to get the details of the trip, I had to strike while they were hot and before they got to their friends on their
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Friends, Foes or Something in Between

“Mom, is Dad your friend?” she asked without notice or context as she sat next to me in the car.  “What…? Like Facebook friends?” I responded quickly to buy some time for a second to process how best to handle this query.  To be truthful, I had never really thought about it. We didn’t start out as friends.  We started out as dating.  Then we were spouses.  Now we are exes.  Ultimately our relationship failed.  In the twelve years we were together, we never experienced the lightness and careless independence of being friends.  I can go months without seeing or
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Single Parent Seesaw

I looked at the month ahead.  Wait. Is that a mistake, I wondered.  Three weekends in a row I had marked down “girls” in my calendar.  Just the thought perked me up.  3 weekends in a row!  Simultaneously a shift and a gift!  My feet danced a little in my shoes as I felt the irresistible urge to jump around and bring my fist down in a triumphant “yes!” I remembered that my former spouse was going on vacation and the result was 3 weekends in a row for me, followed by 3 weekends in a row for him.  As
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Meaningful Mentor: A Tribute to Susan Ann Koenig

If you are lucky in this life you will meet a real-life super hero.  If you are even luckier, that super hero will become your life mentor.  I find myself in the category of luckiest because Susan Ann Koenig is, in fact, a real-life super hero and my life mentor. Susan and I met each other in 1999.  She was the guest lecturer at my family law practice night class in law school.  The topic was Domestic Violence and the Practice of Law.  I was a second year law student and was working 32 hours a week at Friendship Home
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When the Sparkle Fades

I was stunned by the news.  The woman whose brand was sparkle had killed herself.  Kate Spade.  The woman who penned several life mottos for me: “She leaves a little sparkle wherever she goes” and “She is Quick and Curious and Playful and Strong.”  She believed in a “world filled with seersucker and polka dots – friends and fireflies – cocktails and crosswords – personal style and simplicity.” I remember my first Kate Spade purse – bright pink with a big bow.  My friends laugh at my loyalty to her as I save up my money and then carry a
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High Road

The day of the custody trial arrived.  Nervous and feigning politeness to the opposing lawyers, they sat parallel to each other at their respective counsel’s tables.  Plaintiff and Defendant. Also known by two, 5 and 7 year old children, as Mom and Dad. Evidence Round #1:  She testified that the children were adjusting fairly well since they had separated households.  She said that their dad had become more involved in the last year and that was a good thing.  She focused her testimony on her children rather than their rocky past. Evidence Round #2:  He testified about his increased involvement
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The Goal

She shot.  She scored!  And I missed it. Maybe in your household your child scoring a soccer goal is a regular occurrence and accomplishment.  But in our household, for our Sophia, it is nothing short of a minor miracle.  Sophia does not play sports out of athletic drive, skill, or competitiveness.  She plays for the simple enjoyment of being on a team.  She loves the social aspect of sports teams.  She does not love any type of contact with a soccer ball. Suffice it to say, this was an event.  At the time of the goal, I was on the
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Regret

I had my heart broken in one phone call last week.  As soon as I heard my mom’s voice I knew something was wrong.  She was on the verge of tears – a sound to which I am not accustomed to coming from her.  “Suzy died this morning.”  My mom’s older and last living sister had died in her sleep.  I faltered and felt the pressure on my heart as the tears came out in a rush. My aunt had been ill for a couple of months.  Just a few days prior she and her husband made the decision to
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Plan Ahead Parents (a/k/a What You Must Know As A Divorced Parent)

“Please, there is no other time.”  He pled with his ex-wife.  In a twist that only divorced parents can appreciate, he was asking her to take their daughters dress shopping for his second wedding.  They were leaving for the wedding on Friday – in three days.  She sighed, knowing that her daughters needed dresses, but she had obligations on her calendar. His first attempt, two days prior was a complete and total disaster.  The girls had arrived home Monday with new dresses.  On Tuesday, she asked them to model, only to find the dresses were ill-fitting and too clingy for
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The Challenge

She was troubled by her eighth grade essay assignment for school: to write about a significant challenge she had faced in life.  She would be reading this essay in front of her class.  “But I haven’t had a major challenge,” she bemoaned to her teacher.  “Anna, aren’t your parents divorced?” As she relayed this to me, privately I felt proud that she needed that reminder – that she didn’t consider having divorced parents as being a challenge.  I was scooting toward being self-congratulatory and smug until she told me she thought that would be a good topic to write about.
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