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Tag: choices


Grit or Quit?

  It just didn’t occur to me that I could quit my marriage. Not because of my elementary school education at St. Frances Cabrini Church or because I couldn’t make the mortgage payment. I really just didn’t consider it as a choice. I was so ingrained with the gift of grit I never looked at the possibility that I could quit trying. The capacity to endure has inspired me since those when I was still too young to get babysitting jobs. Lying on my bed trying to escape the dog days of Nebraska summers, I spent countless afternoons being inspired
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Divorce Direction

I wasn’t afraid he would kill me. I wasn’t afraid I’d be homeless. I wasn’t afraid my family or church would shun me. Mostly divorce didn’t occur to me. Despite years of pursuing professional help on how to make an unhappy marriage happy, divorce never occurred to me until weeks before I filed. We fought, sure. But we weren’t the dramatic type who threatened to call our lawyer first thing Monday morning.  I was the divorce lawyer. I knew what to do. There was no such thing as an idle threat. Divorce was simply not an option I considered. Compared
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Divorce Decision

We the wise of my mother’s many children thought we knew what was best for her. The family meeting topics included our father’s chronic alcoholism, his refusal to seek treatment, and our concern for our mother. With the passage of decades, the memories are vague. I can’t remember whether my mom wanted to see a lawyer, whether she surrendered as she did to so much of what life dealt her, or if she silently went along to simply avoid an argument. What I do remember is her quiet sadness. The lawyer’s office was dark in the afternoon light and his
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