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Month: March 2012

March 2012

The Gossip Game

The childhood game of telephone was guaranteed to bring peals of laughter.  By the time the whispered message made its way down the line of those passing on the message, it was sure to be a hilarious ending. We played the game because it was fun. But during divorce, a message misinterpreted can cause needless worry, sadness, or anger. We hear that our former spouse is driving a new Lexus. We get upset wondering where the money came from. Later we learn it was a borrowed car.  We are told she was seen sitting at a table for two in
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About Face

It’s complicated.  That should have been my permanent Facebook status in 2011.  I initially joined Facebook for the ability to easily share pictures of my children with my family and friends who lived in states from Florida to Oregon.  So my obvious network included my family – who at that time included my in-laws.  You can imagine my surprise when I realized one day after separating from my husband that I had been unfriended by some of those I had considered family for more than 10 years.  To say it stung is an understatement.   And I noticed the deletion by
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Forever Friends

Melodee and I became friends in an era when BFF was not a part of the lexicon of friendship. 33 years after first meeting in her Boston apartment, we have earned the respective titles. We both married lawyer husbands, had two children, celebrated great career achievements and dismal failures. We saw one another through illness, the deaths of our mothers, divorce, and happy second marriages. Through it all, I learned the value of asking for what I need from a friend. When going through a big life challenge like divorce, our friends want to help. They see our suffering and
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Just Curious

I blame Nancy Drew.  And my Mom.  When I was a little girl, each week my mom would take me to the library where I would check out the next Nancy Drew book in that delightful series to devour, usually within hours.  I love mysteries.  I love questions. I am by definition a curiosity queen. This week I was tasked with preparing for an expert witness’ deposition in a complex custody case.  Preparing for it seemed overwhelming at first glance.  I needed to review the American Psychological Association Guidelines for Forensic Evaluations, I needed to refresh on the facts of
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Appraising Opinions

Our beliefs about marriage are influenced from our earliest days. Growing up in the 1950s, my bride doll was a treasured symbol of the expected aspiration that I get married. I was barely 6 years old when I watched my big sister walk down the aisle of St. Francis Cabrini Church wearing a white dress, carrying a bouquet of red roses. I was still a teen when a romantic boy presented me with a “promise” ring with its tiny diamond, the symbol of pre-engagement. Images, experiences, opinions. Our culture defines our most closely held beliefs about who we can and
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