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Month: August 2013

Month: August 2013

Beating Betrayal

He looked down at his hands folded in his lap as his eyes filled with tears that he didn’t want me to see.  One escaped and started its slow descent down his cheek.  He brushed it away and told me that she had burned all of his childhood photos.  Photos that were not from a digital decade, but from the early 70’s.  Photos that could never be replicated.  Photos that reflected his incremental progression in life. She thought there had been an affair.  In a moment of squarely facing the deepest betrayal, her anger consumed her and fueled the fire
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Adams also came to understand how important it was that his carefully crafted photos were reproduced to best effect.
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Divorce Blessing

“Well at least I got two great kids out of it,” he said with a sigh. It had been a year and a half since his divorce was final and the thirty-something father still felt that strange physical ache in the middle of his chest. A marriage he once envisioned would endure for decades had ended unexpectedly. In reciting the history of his divorce, and he often returned to this refrain in search of the meaning of a marriage gone awry. He couldn’t keep his mind from going to the whys.  Why couldn’t they make it work like his parents
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Bloom

I have never been one much for growing things (except babies), nor am I one who is particularly adept at keeping, say, a houseplant alive. I have harbored a jealousy of my parents who always have beautiful patches of flowers in their yards. I have wondered why I cannot seem to do the same thing – until now.  This beauty, pictured above, grew into her 7 foot tall glory under my careful watch and attention over the last three months. (The other flowers in my garden that did not flourish will be the subject of another blog…) I found a
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No One to Blame

One of the great things about being married is that there is always someone to point out your flaws and someone nearby to blame on them. One of the great things about being divorced is that neither is present. All of us have habits. Some good. Some not so good. My longstanding habits include planning ahead, working hard, and brushing my teeth before I go to bed. Those are the good ones. The “not so good” habit list appears a tad longer. It includes: hurrying on to the next task before I’ve completed the last, leaving a trail of messes
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Parsing Out Parenthood

In the last few years, several states across the country – including Nebraska – have raised the question about parenthood after divorce.  Legislators, judges, lawyers, psychologists, mediators and parents are asking, “What is best for children of divorce?”  Views differ wildly on how custody and parenting time should be shared in a post-divorce family. This year the Nebraska Legislature considered LB 22, a bill creating a presumption of joint physical and joint legal custody.  I now serve on a statewide committee of lawyers and judges (some who supported LB 22) formed to evaluate and critically examine custody and parenting time
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