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Month: April 2014

Month: April 2014

Self-Celebrate

On this eve of my birthday, I am filled with raw excitement. It is like Santa is approaching; only, not just for the night, but for the entire year to follow. There is something so supremely magical about honoring your milestone each and every year. I love my birthday because I take time to unabashedly think about where I am on my life satisfaction scale. I let myself bring new dreams and hopes in and let some of the stale ones go. I also get to eat a piece of spice cake with my mom’s homemade frosting. Some years your
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Moment by Moment

Mary insisted I wait to enter her room until she put on her lipstick. Her arms were the diameter of the steel pole on which the IV hung. Her goal on the white board: “To get fat.” Her doctor insisted she be hospitalized after her weight dropped to a dangerously low level. She drove herself there. It was clear she considered it all quite an inconvenience. Mary fretted about getting her tax return in the mail. She worried about missing her part-time job because, “They’ll look for any excuse to get rid of you at my age.” Mary lives alone
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Conscious Uncoupling

My best friend’s daughter, Lela (age 6), recently outlined her criteria for a marriage partner:                         Do you cigarette? (smoke)                         Do you litter?                         Do you believe in God? At a young age, she has already determined there must be a conscious decision to choose a mate.  She inherently understands the choice will be based on shared values.  Her mindfulness is mature. No doubt in that last couple of weeks you heard that Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin planned to engage in “conscious uncoupling,” a/k/a divorce.  While many jeered her selective word choice, this divorce lawyer applauded.  There is
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The Graying of Divorce

“Thirty-seven years!” the judge barked in disgust. “You’ve gotten along this long, why do you want to start all over now?”  My client turned in his chair and looked at me, his eyes wide in panic. We had met in my office the week before to prepare for how events might unfold in the courtroom. I reassured him that nothing bad would happen, while simultaneously cautioning him that any time you enter a courtroom there is a measure of unpredictability. This was it. In a no-fault divorce state like ours, where a proclamation of “irreconcilable differences” is enough to grant
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