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Month: April 2019

Month: April 2019

10 Golden Rules to Protect Your Kids During a Divorce

Ideally, parents going through a divorce make it a priority to work together to lessen the negative impact the divorce may have on their children.  Although it may be difficult for you to set aside your own marital differences during this stressful time, you can make the transition easier for your children if you follow these 10 rules: Don’t blame each other.  When you explain the divorce to your children, do it together and avoid blaming each other.  It is important for your children to love each parent unconditionally; placing blame makes it more likely a child will build up
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Appreciating April

Some months seem more special than others. Take December: Christmas, my birthday, and my children coming home for the holidays. Then there’s February: Ground Hog Prom, Valentine’s Day, and the birthdays of three of my sibs.  But April. April wins my heart. April imbues me with appreciation. April is the birth month of many amazing beings in my life. Koledon who can cook or sew or grow practically anything, Roger who is fast feeling like a brother, Hannah in Atlanta with her ever ready smile. Add to them Caroline, Mo, and so many more that I adore. Some of the
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#tbt I Say It’s My Birthday!

Back in 2012, Angela celebrated her first birthday post-divorce. As her birthday was this week, we re-visit how she felt on that day. I love my birthday.  Love it.  And I don’t care that it sounds self-centered.  I believe wholeheartedly in self celebration.  I appreciate reflecting on the year I have just journeyed through, seeing what I have come through, and where I want to make shifts in the year ahead. I am finding that as this first birthday approaches, post-divorce it is more meaningful than ever.  After a year of fierce living and working through large loss, now more
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3 Mistakes to Avoid During Your Divorce

In an effort to transition through your divorce relatively unscathed — both financially and emotionally – you will need to take an active role in attempting to keep things civil.  In other words, you have a role to play in maintaining the civility in your divorce. Long gone are the days when divorce was all about assigning fault and sorting out who’s the winner and who’s the loser.  The goal for divorce today is fairness and equitable treatment for both parties — and if children are involved, keeping their interests paramount. One of the best ways to avoid making the
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Trash or Treasure

I’d made it a mile from home in another attempt at a couch to 5k when I stopped. It was trash collection day in the neighborhood, so maybe that’s all it was.  Trash. I got closer to see a couple of school books sprawled on the edge of the sidewalk, a black spiral notebook beside them. Had a teen been bullied and their back pack emptied?  Had someone been kicked out of the house by an angry parent?  Was I really nosing around in someone’s garbage? I was. I looked inside the books for a name. Nothing. I picked up
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#TBT Easy

Looks can be deceiving. While things may seem easier for others, take a closer look, and maybe you will find some compassion. “You have it so much easier because you only have your kids half the time.” He made this statement a couple of times during our conversation.  The first time it fell out of his mouth I felt like a victim of Little Bunny Foo Foo hopping through the forest being bopped on the head. It didn’t sting so much as shock my system. The next time he said it, the normally dormant lava bubbles in my gut started
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10 Factors That Influence How Quickly You Recover From Divorce

According to a recent article in Psychology Today, how quickly and well you recover from a divorce depends largely on these 10 factors: 1.  The length of the marriage. The longer you and your spouse were together, the more entwined your lives became — which makes it more likely that it will take longer for the two of you to become used to functioning as a single person rather than a couple. 2.  If the divorce was a surprise. If you had no idea that your spouse was going to ask you for a divorce, the surprise element can make
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Texas Beauties

I told myself I wasn’t going back. The last time I spent a week drinking wheatgrass juice and eating plates of sprouts sprinkled with seaweed I said I was satisfied. No need to return. I’d find some other way to cleanse my body and mind. But here I was. Back again. The chance to join both my best friend and my life coach in warm weather while winter overstayed its welcome in Nebraska was irresistible. A taste of the Texas beauty I was about to experience in the week ahead first appeared on the drive in the country from the
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It’s Only Me

“Why should I bother? No one is going to see it. It’s only me.” As I listened to my friend make his case for never making his bed, I immediately understood. Why rush to do the dishes when there’s no one but you and your pet rabbit to see it?  Who cares if there are crumbs in between the sofa cushions, when only you know they are there? If a friend is dropping in for a chat, I dust the table top, trim the wick so the candle will light, and hang a fresh towel in the bathroom. Clothes slung
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How Your Social Media Habits Can Impact Your Divorce

One thing that couples divorcing only a decade ago didn’t have to take into consideration was their social media habits.  Today, with the vast majority of Americans living their lives out loud online, social media can be a virtual minefield when it comes to divorce.  Don’t supply evidence against you. Once your divorce is initiated, it’s possible that your spouse and his or her attorney may seek out your social media pages for potential evidence in your case. This is why you need to be very careful about what you post.  When posting, remember your ultimate intentions for your case. 
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