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Month: March 2021

Month: March 2021

A Friend in Need

“A friend in need is a friend indeed.”  She was a court reporter. I was a lawyer.  We bonded over our German heritage, working in the juvenile court system, and having alcoholic fathers.  Each year I endure three months of teasing from Gretchen that she’s “younger” than me. Today the annual ribbing ends as I celebrate the birth of my friend of nearly 40 years.  We expect our closest friends to show up for our big life events. Gretchen was there for the funeral of my father, my brother, my mother, and my husband.  But Gretchen always went beyond. She opened her home for one wedding, one memorial service, and plenty of parties just because she loved me.  Gretchen can
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Accepting Influence

I spy the basket full of folded newspaper pages. They are the pages pulled from The Oregon Coast Today and Lincoln City News Guard – two local papers my dad picks up from the grocery store on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  In my six-month absence from a coastal visit, the accumulation is large.  Comprised only of 5 star or highest difficulty puzzles, my dad has silently offered the challenge and I feel wonderfully loved.  It takes me back to the beginning of this tradition with my dad from another spring break visit with him on the coast.  Eleven years ago, when
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WINTERS END

I stopped attending art openings. I took up lifting a kettlebell, staying inside instead of going out to the gym. I was unsure how long before it would be over and whether life would ever be the same again.  It wasn’t a winter with coronavirus.  It was the last winter of many winters of John living with cancer. Ten years ago, the rooms of tea parties with macarons and brunches with bubbly became a home hospice and I became the gracious hostess greeting guests arriving to say their goodbyes.   The same sofa to which John trekked to and from each day from our bed—proving to himself and the world he wasn’t quite ready to leave— became a place of rest again this winter after my son Benjamin had two limbs crushed in a head on crash. The walker, the pillows,
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Letting Love In

“I had no idea there’d be such an outpouring…I’m not used to being on the receiving end.” Tears started to stream down the face of the child turned man whose blue eyes matched his hospital gown. My first-born Benjamin gave his first Facebook thanks two weeks after a driver on I-80 crossed the median at full speed, hitting Ben’s car head-on, crushing his limbs and his hopes for the year ahead.  Ben’s friends had been eager to start a GoFundMe to help. He was reluctant. Being white and male and educated he knew his privilege. What he did not know was the duration of his healing journey and the high cost of not being able to walk or work or open a jar.  Ben is both
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Nonmarital and Premarital Property in a Nebraska Divorce

In almost every Nebraska divorce, spouses must address the issue of determining premarital and nonmarital property. This is especially true in high-wealth divorces, which frequently entail assets acquired from a variety of sources, and second-marriage divorces, which often involve spouses who have acquired a sizable portion of their wealth prior to marriage. Dividing Property in a Nebraska Divorce Under Nebraska law, courts equitably divide all assets and debts acquired by either spouse during marriage, and most courts interpret equitable to mean equal. However, Nebraska courts do not divide premarital and nonmarital property, and instead award such property exclusively to one
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