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Month: March 2024

March 2024

Tips for Co-Parenting Successfully with a Narcissist

Being married —  then divorced — from a narcissist is bad enough, but when you must co-parent with one, the difficult becomes the almost impossible.  Your co-parent narcissist thrives on dysfunction, which makes for a miserable co-existence.  However, if you are aware of their tactics, you’ll be in a better position to deal with them.  Here are some tips for identifying those tactics and how to cope: Expect spiteful behavior and learn to ignore it.  The narcissist thrives on getting an emotional reaction, and is often able to get one by making nasty comments to prompt your response.  Learn to
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Mandala Madness

Preface:  If in your mind’s eye you fancy me a sophisticated and/or elegant lady lawyer:  number one – thank you; and number two – you should probably stop reading now. One of my favorite hobbies is hand stitching.  My preferred medium is felt and sequins (think 1980’s childhood and me adoring the handmade ornaments my mom made out of sequins and felt).  One of my prized possessions is a plastic box with 16 compartments that holds my rainbow-color-coordinated sequins.  My daughters tease me that I would save that box before them if our home were burning.  Point is – I
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Out-of-State Travel

Can my co-parent book airline tickets and travel out-of-state with our child? Does he/she need my consent first? Is our child allowed to leave Nebraska with either parent? The country? These questions are common for parents transitioning into their new normal of co-parenting. With the holidays right around the corner, you may be wondering what rights you have to take your child out of state. Or, perhaps your co-parent has already booked plane tickets, but you disagree with your small child flying on an airplane. Can anything be done? Parents have the right to spend holiday or vacation time with
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If I Called ICE

 She leapt up from the bleacher in a giant cheer. The star of her alma mater’s basketball team made the winning shot.  But as Victoria shuffled out the gym door amidst the crowd of smiling students, I saw seriousness rather than celebration on her face. “How are you, Victoria?” I asked as we walked down the hall of the high school that once was mine. “I’m stressed.” “What’s up?” “I’m behind in paying for my classes,” she said, looking down at her sneakers. After graduation, Victoria had enrolled in community college. “That’s gotta be tough.” We were both silent for
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There was a hole on the wall.  She stared at it with the tears coming anew.  This hole was not the kind that needed spackling and sanding, but the kind that needed time and space to replace the vacancy.  She had just taken down the wedding portrait of her son and now former daughter-in-law.  The divorce decree had been signed and the woman who had frequented their kitchen table would now be permanently absent. There are similar hallways in houses we have all been in.  Black and white photos of founding family members, baby pictures never being replaced to the
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Divorce Tax Tips: 5 Most Common Divorce Tax Questions in Nebraska

Do I have to pay income tax when my ex-spouse and I transfer property or pay a property settlement per the terms of our divorce decree? No.  The transfer of property (or payment of a property settlement payment) pursuant to a divorce decree is not taxable.  However, you’ll want to keep in mind the future tax consequences of a subsequent sale, withdrawal, or transfer of assets that you received in a property settlement. Does the payment or receipt of child support impact my taxes? No.  Child support is not taxed as income to the parent who receives it nor deductible
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Settlement v. Trial: 10 Things to Consider

All divorces end by either settling or going to trial. While the vast majority take the former route, settlement is not always the best or most appropriate option. Determining whether to settle or to take your case to trial can be a difficult decision. Here are some questions to consider when making your decision. How fast do I want my case resolved? If completing your case as soon as possible is important to you, then settlement may be favorable to trial. How much money am I willing to spend on my case? Trials can add a significant cost to your
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International Women’s Day

She didn’t talk about her past. Not about her early innocent farm life. Not about being a child in a refugee camp, making toys from mud and sticks. Not about the girls next door who died when their tent caught fire. Laila’s focus was on the women in another continent. Laila’s family was Yazidi, a religious minority in northern Iraq. In 2014, Isis militants attacked the Yazidis in the Sinjar region. For two weeks, Isis inflicted an unrelenting terror of genocide upon the Yazidis. Thousands of women and girls were assaulted and sold into sex slavery. By the time I
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Courage and a Conversation

A wave of nausea hit my stomach every time I thought about it.  There was a conversation about our financial obligations for our kids that I needed to have with my former spouse that I did not want to have.  I dreaded it.  I delayed it.  I downright ignored it. Our co-parenting relationship has been consistently strong.  We are able to attend parent-teacher conferences together as parents.  Recently, we sat at one table together at our daughter’s 8th grade graduation reception with our respective families and it was pleasant.  I can send him messages with the eyeroll emoji attached when
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What’s the Difference Between Collaborative Divorce and Mediation?

Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution in which spouses meet with a neutral third party to reach agreements regarding the issues in their divorce.  The mediator’s role is to help spouses understand each other’s interests, provide clarity regarding the issues, and help craft the parties’ agreements.   Not all mediators in Nebraska are lawyers.  However, if you want to mediate all of the issues in your divorce, including the division of your assets and debts, child support, alimony, and the parenting plan, for example, you need to work with an attorney-mediator. However, in mediation, the attorney-mediator is not allowed to
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