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Month: September 2018

September 2018

The Company I Keep

“I live a charmed life,” I say as the weekend came to a close. “It’s the company you keep,” she teases back. For close to 30 years Gretchen has gathered a group of women to her lake home to honor autumn’s start. Pumpkins, pots of chili, and piles of pillows greet us upon our arrival. We prepare by packing away our phones and putting on our comfiest clothes. Karla brings the red Twizzlers. I bring the red wine. No one spends much time talking about the Big Red football game. We are here for the company we keep. The company
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Knowing Our Needs

My daughters hurt my feelings.  They didn’t mean to and I am sure they were not aware of their infraction.  But I was feeling sad and put out all the same.  They were at their dad’s house when my newly published book had arrived.  I excitedly opened the box and pulled out the neat stack of hardbound books.  I hugged one to my chest and sighed with pent-up cheer.  The celebration would be a day delayed. This goal was years in the making and one of my proudest accomplishments.  I was bursting.  Of course I shared the news with my
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Obtaining a Domestic Abuse Protection Order in Nebraska

Spousal abuse is a potentially life-threatening situation—the seriousness of which cannot be overstated. If you or your children are experiencing physical violence, or even the threat of physical violence, from your current or former spouse, you should seek advice from your attorney immediately about obtaining a domestic abuse protection order. Here are the basic steps to obtain a domestic abuse protection order in Nebraska: Determine Whether You Are Eligible To obtain a domestic abuse protection order for you or your children, you must be either the current or former spouse of the abuser, a current or former romantic partner of
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Hurt Heart Healed

“You’re not going to have your mother’s heart problems,” he said with confidence. My exam complete, I left the office assured I would not face years of living with heart disease. This week my oldest child turned 35, the same age as my brother Tim when he died. The love in my heart for my child makes it impossible for me to comprehend how my mother ever got out of bed again after Tim’s death. She was my best teacher of a resilient heart. Research has long shown that stress, grief, and fear  literally damage hearts. As our “fight or
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Mandala Madness

Preface:  If in your mind’s eye you fancy me a sophisticated and/or elegant lady lawyer:  number one – thank you; and number two – you should probably stop reading now. One of my favorite hobbies is hand stitching.  My preferred medium is felt and sequins (think 1980’s childhood and me adoring the handmade ornaments my mom made out of sequins and felt).  One of my prized possessions is a plastic box with 16 compartments that holds my rainbow-color-coordinated sequins.  My daughters tease me that I would save that box before them if our home were burning.  Point is – I
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Later Lessons Learned

“No point arguing”  he would say calmly. My litigation skills gave me a distinct advantage.  No need for him to tell me I was wrong.  He simply showed me. John and I loved each other. We shared deeply held values. We also approached life differently, and I had a lot to learn. On Fridays, John joined friends for a happy hour. I eked out a few more emails after everyone left the office for the weekend. I silently claimed the moral superiority of a staunch work ethic. “You’re welcome to join me,” he would say when he headed to our
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#TBT Performance Review

I get nervous just thinking about it – all of my co-workers rating me in all areas of my professional performance.  Do I keep my promises?  Do I approach my work with enthusiasm?  Do I listen without interrupting? Every year I must remind myself why I actively choose to put myself through a performance review. Founded on the principle “look, see, tell the truth, take authentic action,” our firm coach, Susan, teaches us that to move toward growth and betterment these four steps are key.  Performance reviews help us pause to look.  Our co-workers and supervisors help us see and
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How is Child Support Affected by Parenting Time?

In Nebraska, the amount of parenting time with your children directly affects the amount of child support you will receive or owe to your former spouse. Generally speaking, the more parenting time, the more child support you will receive. Here are answers to three frequently asked questions regarding how parenting time affects child support: How Is Parenting Time Calculated? For the purpose of calculating child support, parenting time is defined by the total number of “overnights” that a parent has with the children during a year. For example, if you and your former spouse share an equal amount of parenting
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Empowering Path Partners

I’ve always loved law students. Their intelligence. Their enthusiasm. Their commitment. I taught law as an adjunct for close to a decade. A single guest lecture I gave on domestic violence at another law school  led me to a law student who would change my life: Angela Dunne. I would become her employer, her mentor, her coach. She would become my role model, my teacher, and the manager of our law firm. When Angela and I met for the first time at the Flatiron Café her plucky attitude enabled her to ask for what she wanted before the dessert menu
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May I Have My Children?

The text read:  “Two tickets to Taylor Swift.  You get first dibs if you want them.”  My heart started beating a bit.  I started nodding my head to Swift’s lyrics “Big reputation, big reputation” playing in my mind. Two tickets.  Dang.  I will have to pick – although really, the choice was made for me. My youngest daughter’s birthday was this week. This could be a fun birthday celebration.  I would take Sophia. “When is the concert?” I asked.  “This weekend.”  Double dang.  It wasn’t my weekend.  And to compound the whammy – Sophia’s birthday was this weekend while she
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