“It’ll keep for a few days, won’t it?” he asked. My eyes got big. I smiled nervously. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “I’m not sure I can be trusted with it,” I said. The last quarter of the dense, moist two-layer spice birthday cake with thick buttercream frosting sat on the china dinner plate.  If it…

When Nancy said she wanted me to be a part of her wedding to Linetta, I knew it would be in another state.   It was years before the glorious ruling from the Supreme Court on marriage equality. Today we celebrate the 5 year anniversary of the day we read the words of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg:   They ask for equal dignity in the…

“Just the state of the world,” she said, tears falling one by one. She brushed her long brown hair—that had grown considerably longer this year—off of her downcast face. She hardly knew where to begin. This day, like all since the start of the pandemic, she gave every ounce of dwindling energy to her job….

With June half gone and virtually all weddings postponed, the tears are different. Gentle weeping from the emotions of the music and the moment become full-fledged sobbing of frustration and disappointment. Grand plans long awaited to be lived are not.  I’ve officiated many weddings. (Yes, she with a long history of doing divorces.) The words of love, the witnessing of commitment, the…

It took me nearly nine years to clean one closet. After John died and most of his clothes had made it to the men’s shelter like he’d asked, I attempted to clear it but mostly kept it crammed with everything from seldom worn jackets to supplies for making vision boards.  Unlike me, John delighted in getting rid of things. Because his journey from a terminal…

When recent results from the Covid-19 Impact Survey revealed that 6 out of 10 of us had felt anxious, depressed, lonely, or hopeless in the preceding 7 days, I was reminded of that which I have mostly had the luxury of merely observing.  I heard the buzzing open of two sets of locked doors that clang loudly behind you as you enter the…

Sometime between the fading of the hot pink blooms of the redbud trees and the arrival of the purple striped tulips, I began my daily watch. Last week I drove by to see, but it was not yet time. Patience, I reminded myself. But now it was a Monday morning after a week of biding…

“Was what I just said really true?” I silently asked myself.  I’d just claimed I felt sad that I would not be with my children on Mother’s Day. In the moment I did feel a little sad. While not an unusual thought for a mother to have, I questioned it.  My children moved to other cities many years ago. If pressed, I could not remember the last Mother’s…

May Day reminds me of how I’ve never been good the anonymous acts of kindness.  I do love to help. With three younger siblings there was always a child in need of shoe tied or a nose wiped.  When I was old enough to babysit for other families, I delighted in sweeping the floors and doing the dishes to please the returning parents. By junior high, volunteering was vital in my life.  First as a lawyer, now…

The speed with which it lodged in my throat took me by surprise. What had begun with the sharing of a lighthearted meme ended with me feeling like I might cry over two tiny words from Brian. Brothers can do that to you.  I grew up with five brothers, three older, two younger. I was six years old when my…

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