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Tag: Holidays


Home for the Holidays

The biscotti baked, the bows on the boxes, and the Christmas brunch menu planned, I was happy as I awaited the one time a year when my sons return home from opposite coasts. My joy evaporated when one of my homeward bound boys got stuck in an airport over a thousand miles away. There were a dozen other passengers ahead of him, each desperately hoping to get a seat on the next flight out. I commanded my sinking heart to rise up and listen to my rational mind.  He’s an adult. He’s capable. He’ll figure it out. He’s lived away
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Transitioning Traditions

It was quiet Thanksgiving morning.  My kitchen was void of the warmth and scent of stuffing and turkey cooking in the oven.  I trudged down the stairs to get the super- ad-stuffed newspaper to peruse while watching the parade.  This, the first time it felt like a chore.  I felt off – cranky, sad, and alone.   My girls were in Texas with their dad and paternal grandparents for the Thanksgiving holiday.  I was home alone in Nebraska left with my woe-is-me thoughts as my only comfort. Holidays are hard.   This refrain is a reality for most, but not all, divorced
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Have To or Get to

It’s arrived. The time when I shift the focus of my attention from my big goals of the year to my most treasured season.  In the weeks ahead I get to fulfill my intention to be a gracious hostess for my family and friends. My tacky but treasured turkey napkin holders will accompany my china as I light taper candles on my linen covered Thanksgiving table set for my brothers and sisters and their families. Ten days later I host my big party of the year in memory of my late brother, Tim, and friends will donate to a non-profit
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Each December a series of tiny treasures arrive in my mailbox. A Cat Lovers Against the Bomb calendar. A refrigerator magnet from my favorite cinema. Return address labels with snowflakes. Gifts from good causes all hoping to receive a return gift from me. I love making lists, so the penguin and reindeer notepad was about to be saved from the recycle bin when I noticed the personalization, “The Koenig Family, 1266 South 13th Street.” A subtle sadness washed over me as I thought, “No family lives at this address.” “Family” for me has long equaled a husband and children living
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Magic in Moments

Look at her long legs stretched all the way to the floor.  Look at her outfit compared to her younger sister’s – the fancy dress dismissed for a fashion statement.  Look at this girl near 10 years old, with the knowledge behind those grown up glasses that she is now sitting on a stranger’s lap, not the comforting lap of a magical man.  This photo was taken last week and after posting it for friends and family to see – I had a moment of embarrassment when I realized my state of denial. Denial comes in many forms, frequently followed
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One of my favorite nights of the year fell on this Sunday past.  The second Sunday in December, each year, my former neighborhood lines it’s streets with white paper bags filled with a candle that burns throughout the night.  Each year the neighborhood is filled with a serene peace and beauty.  Perhaps that is the draw for me – the quiet – in the middle of the holiday hustle. I have been hosting a party on luminary night for several years.  The tradition began while I was married and living in my marital residence.  I was divorced two years ago
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Sacred Time

For as long as I can remember I have enjoyed setting goals and reaching them. Whether it was saving a sum of money for college or throwing a birthday party for a friend, I got a kick out of making a plan and making it happen. Each year I set enthusiastic goals. Each goal has a deadline for completion before the end of year holidays. I declare these weeks a sacred time. To be sacred means to be dedicated to a specific purpose. I dedicate the final weeks of each year to creating a season of joy and meaning. I
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The holiday season is upon us and for those of us divorced moms and dads, the holidays inevitably mean some of the upcoming days may be tinged with sadness, angst or downright Scrooge-ish behavior.  Recently I confronted the question of what holidays really mean.  I was forced to assess my own rigidity when it comes to holiday traditions and celebrations. A few weeks ago, my former spouse and co-parent mentioned switching weekends around the Thanksgiving holiday because he was travelling to Texas to visit his parents.  His plan was to drive.  Our daughters had not seen their grandparents whom they
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