Skip to content

Month: May 2025

May 2025

Perfect Ending: How My Divorce Cured My Perfectionism

As a child, I was annoyed when other kids colored outside the lines.  I fundamentally did not comprehend how people could not stay in a straight line behind our teacher on the way to the cafeteria. I could spend hours organizing coins, decks of cards, or colors – by strict classifications of size, color, and numerical order. These were early signs of my Type A personality being born. As I moved into junior high and high school, I over-achieved with a jammed-packed activity schedule while working 2 jobs and maintaining Honor Roll level grades.  A crumpling crying feeling would strike if I
Read More

Mediation vs. Going to Court: A Realistic Cost Comparison

When facing a legal dispute, it’s natural to picture the courtroom: lawyers at the ready, a judge presiding, and the tension of a formal process. But what many people don’t realize is that this path often comes with a hefty emotional and financial price tag. Court cases can drag on for months or even years, with layers of legal fees, time off work, and the mental strain of public proceedings. The structure can feel overwhelming—and for some, unsustainable. Mediation offers a different route. It’s typically quicker, more collaborative, and less financially draining than traditional litigation. Instead of being locked in
Read More

Koenig|Dunne Expands Divorce and Family Law Services into Iowa

At Koenig|Dunne, we believe that every family deserves compassionate, skilled legal support—no matter which side of the river they live on. That’s why we’re excited to share some big news: our firm is expanding our divorce and family law services into Western Iowa. Attorney Kelsey Deabler brings over decade of experience practicing family law in Iowa. Kelsey has a deep understanding of Iowa courts and a heartfelt commitment to helping families through some of life’s most difficult transitions. Her approach aligns perfectly with our goals to serve our clients: to provide clear guidance, unwavering support, and smart solutions during times
Read More

Picture Perfect

When Santa came to visit my house for Christmas in 1984, he gifted me a Fisher-Price Kids Kodak 110 Film blue camera.  It was the second-best Santa gift I ever received next to the “Pretty In Pink” Barbie from 1981. My camera came with a cartridge of eight flashbulbs to use indoors. I fancied myself a photographer while posing my Barbies, my cats, and my favorite Raggedy Ann doll around our backyard.  Soon after the first set of prints were picked up from the film developer, my mom bought me my first scrapbook. I meticulously kept scrapbooks from 1984 to
Read More

Mediation Mondays: What to Do When Kids Are Involved

Talking to Your Children About DivorceDivorce is a life-changing event not just for parents, but especially for children. It’s important to speak with your kids in an age-appropriate, honest, and compassionate way. Let them know that the divorce is not their fault, and avoid putting them in the middle of adult issues. Children need reassurance that they are still loved and supported by both parents, even if the family dynamic is changing. Starting this conversation with empathy and clarity helps ease fear and confusion. How Mediation Helps Center the ChildMediation provides a structured and neutral environment where parents can focus
Read More

Dear Moms

A letter to the moms I have worked with over the last 20 years Dear Moms, I have been watching you for years.  I have been listening to your struggles. I have been hearing your hope.  You have been teaching me strength, grit, persistence, passion, and loyalty.  You have been showing me the path of motherhood and I thank you. I see you reach for the tissue when you mention your child’s name the first time we meet in my office.  I hear you struggling with the decision to disrupt your intact family for a better life in the future,
Read More

Mediation Mondays: What Happens After Mediation?

Mediation can be a relief—it means you’ve reached a mutual agreement and avoided a lengthy court battle. But once the session ends, many clients ask, “What now?” The next step is finalizing the paperwork. Depending on your situation, this might include a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU), Parenting Plan, or a formal settlement agreement. These documents should accurately reflect what was agreed upon in mediation, and it’s often wise to have them reviewed—or drafted—by an attorney to ensure they’re legally sound. Adjusting Agreements When Life Changes Even the best agreements might need tweaking over time. Life changes—like new jobs, relocations, or
Read More

Barbie Bliss

I recall it with precision.  I saved every dollar I earned doing chores for my mom and grandma for the entire summer until I reached the magic number of $20.  That was enough to purchase the Pink and Pretty Barbie my seven-year-old heart coveted. We went to Mervyn’s (a West coast retailer in the 1980’s akin to what Target would become) and I pricked with pride as I took the hot pink box to the cash register.  Tucked inside our family’s turquoise station wagon on the way home, I didn’t take my eyes off Barbie’s blue eyes staring at me
Read More

Parenting Plans

Both of us baby-faced and needing frequent naps, I could have spent the rest of my days with her head tucked safely under my chin and her little sixteen-pound body warming my heart.  At six months into her life, I was finally getting the hang of things and not congratulating myself nightly that she was still breathing. I was now accustomed to the permanent expansion of my heart. Little did I know then that in seven short years, her father and I would be working through a divorce and my plans for parenting with him would be barely recognizable by the
Read More

Archives